Oh City, My City!

I wanted to write about my city today. My wonderful, amazing, heartbeat of the world city. My city where most of the incredible things that have ever happened to me took place. My city that has spawned some of the most fulfilling and vital relationships and experiences in my 44 years. My now bruised, disabled, and hurting city.  

 Since the Coronvirus’s unwelcome arrival I have struggled with so many feelings. Having an anxiety disorder during a pandemic is bad enough but having one whilst being quarantined often feels unbearable. All the what ifs and the what nows can bring on a shower of fear and uncertainty that can feel inescapable. And one of those fears that is always persistent is for My City.

So many places and communities have not been enveloped with the devastating effects from The Coronavirus like New York. I'm grateful for that. I pray daily that it stays that way. But as I look at my poor crippled city I hurt. When I look at my friends who have lost their jobs and their homes, their businesses and their life savings...their hope, I feel helpless and scared. 

This virus is like an ocean that has thousands of off-springing rivers, lakes, creeks and brooks that have over taken all of our lives in some manner. Every single one of us no matter how financially stable or healthy we remain has had something valuable and possibly irreplaceable taken from us during this crisis. Some days seem too dark to see any skyscrapers left. 

When I think about the multitude of my favorite places, places that have brought so much joy to so many being closed and gone forever I shudder. When I consider all of the crushed dreams of so many who have worked so hard, I cry out in protest. As I listen to my friends say they are moving out of the city for good I am confronted with how different life is going look going forward. When I speak to those whose stories and experiences during this time highlight just how far my beloved town has fallen I think...How can NYC survive this? 

And then I remember what city I am lamenting for. I remember what I have always known about the place I chose to call my home. I remember that nothing has been able to stop it’s recovery. Not debilitating fires, not a depression, not hurricanes or riots and certainly not terrorist attacks. NYC will do as it has always done. It will prevail. 

It will rise up and its heartbeat will once again be loud and strong. The people will return. The restaurants will once again open. The businesses will thrive. Broadway will be brighter than ever. The sounds and smells (good and bad) will permeate the air. That electric all consuming energy that no other city in the world can replicate will return. I cannot tell you when. I cannot tell you how. But I can tell you my city, New York City, will once again stand tall and proud. 

New Yorkers and their unbreakable resilience will abound. Those of us dedicated, committed, and enthralled with all that is our city will make it so. The ones whose souls have always been united with this town will see to it. And that belief is what soothes my fears. That deep-rooted understanding that I live in a city that has always inspired hope through it’s continual survival is what calms my anxiety. 

New York City will return to it’s former glory. Just like it has time and time again! 

As Always, Thank You For Reading!